How Well Do You Know Your Child

by Jen Reichert

As a parent, you probably know your child better than anyone else, right? You might be surprised to learn that in our experience, we’ve seen parent after parent find out they don’t know their kiddos as well as they thought they did.

So, per our yoozh, we’re here to help!

Anybody who knows about our work at Foster Village can tell you that part of what we do is teach families how to connect and build trusting relationships that last. One of the best ways to do that is to fully know each other inside and out. Unfortunately for many of us, the grind of daily life - and even our own perceptions and beliefs - can get in the way.

It makes sense, doesn’t it? Who your child was when he was four isn’t always who he is at six or ten, and I’d bet many of you are patting yourselves on the back because you understand the concept. But have you ever heard yourself say something like, “Oh, that doesn’t sound like my Skippy. He’d never eat broccoli.” Or, “Skippy, you don’t like sports. Why would you try out for the football team?”

On the surface, both are harmless comments, but when you peel back the layers, you might see each one is also misguided. If left alone, seemingly flippant comments like those can create an obstacle to forming healthy relationships, even if the intentions are good.

To think of it another way, take stock of how you feel and react when people make assumptions about you based on prior knowledge or their own opinions. Sometimes, they know you so well, they hit the nail on the head without even trying, and as a result, have a way of speaking truth over you. What a comfort!

But other times, they’re mistaken, and you want - you need - them to know they’re wrong about you. Dive a little deeper and think about how it feels when you try to explain yourself and they don’t believe you. Do you still want to share yourself with them? I’d venture to guess you might not.

It’s the same for your kids. They want to be known by you. So, how well do you really know them?

During the pandemic, we heard from many families who felt they were finally getting the quality bonding time they knew they were lacking but just couldn’t seem to create outta thin air. Take a lesson from them, and use what we all learned in that slower time to get to know one another better.

To help you, use the following quiz and let us know how it goes! If you get every answer correct or instead need to make corrections, you’re making a valuable effort that will go a long way in deepening your relationship with your child. And for that, you can pat yourself right on the back.

Want more helpful resources? Check out the Links and Resources page on our website!